I give myself very good advice; a self stern telling off. 

You ever read back something you wrote a while ago and think ‘yeah, bang on’. 

I was feeling a bit disillusioned with running goals, not sure if time chasing or treadmill worshiping were right for me.

 I’ve been ‘putting myself out there’ more recently and in the spirit of making sure I don’t make a tit of myself on the internet I re-read my old blog posts.

  1. I’ve become so much more self deprecating recently. Without those beginner gains I have been so down about every run.
  2. Sometimes I make me laugh.
  3. See 1 again.

It was clear that since settling into my life in Scotland again I was running less but also I was not blogging as much. There was a simple answer to this, I was no longer Nelly No Mates and being back in a country where people spoke my language I didn’t need to speak to a blog to feel better. 

But by that same token because I wasn’t trying to make me feel better what was I doing? Was I falling into that social media trap of needing to show constant happiness and self improvement at all times. In truth, I think I had. Yes, I wanted to challenge myself but I had done so at the expense of cherishing just the emotions running brings. 

Being back in a world I understood meant I was in a world I was now comparable to those around me. I am not comparable to those around me. 

I am me. My pace is my own. My goals and loves and fist bumps every 0.1k were my own. My running is good regardless of how much someone else does. 

My previous posts made that clear and along the way I had forgotten this. 

This serves as a reminder to myself. Enjoy what you do and don’t become a slave to ‘public self improvement’. Blog because you like it, no other reasons.

Got that girl? Good. Now carry on and clock dem miles.  

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